Get ideas here for humorous anecdotes, stories and snippets you can use for your next presentation or speech.

There are three types of companies: those who make things happen; those who watch things happen; and those who wonder what's happened. -- Anonymous --

"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong, goes wrong, it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair. -- Douglas Adams (1952-2001) --

"Get your facts first, and then you can distort 'em as you please." -- Mark Twain (1835-1903) --

"You're always in control of your behavior, sometimes you just control yourself in ways you wish you hadn't. -- Aldo Pucci --

An engineer is someone who knows a great deal about a very little subject area. As they progress in their career, they learn more and more about less and less. They end up knowing everything about practically nothing.

A salesperson is someone who knows a little bit about practically everthing. As they progress in their career, they know less and less about more and more until they know almost nothing about practically everything.

A marketing specialist is someone who starts out knowing everything about everything, but they end up knowing nothing about anything because of their long association with engineers and sales persons.

Sometimes you get asked tough questions, and if you can acknowledge and answer the question in a humorous way, you break the tension and help get the mind-set away from antagonistic prejudgement to more neutral terrority. Here is an example how former President Ronald Reagan handled a provactive exchange at a press conference in Washington, DC on September 28, 1982:

Reporter: Mr. President, in talking about the continuing recession tonight, you have blamed mistakes on the past, and you've blamed Congress. Does any of the blame belong to you?
Ronald Reagan: Yes, because for many years I was a Democrat.

(c) 2003-2008 Deborah Spaltmann English Marketing Communications. Ringstr. 42, D-83224 Grassau. Tel. +48 (0)8641 6949-83. http://www.spaltmann.com